Fantasticness overload

(Does giving this stuff a name make it any easier? I love it.)

CORRIEARKLET (n.)

The moment at which two people approaching from opposite ends of a long passageway recognise each other and immediately pretend they haven't. This is to avoid the ghastly embarassment of having to continue recognising each other the whole length of the corridor.

CORRIECRAVIE (n.)

To avert the horrors of corrievorrie (q.v.) corriecravie is usually employed. This is the cowardly but highly skilled process by which both protagonists continue to approach while keeping up the pretence that they haven't noticed each other - by staring furiously at their feet, grimacing into a notebook, or studying the walls closely as if in a mood of deep irritation

CORRIEDOO (n.)

The crucial moment of false recognition in a long passageway encounter. Though both people are perfectly well aware that the other is approaching, they must eventually pretend sudden recognition. They now look up with a glassy smile, as if having spotted each other for the first time (and are particularly delighted to have done so), shouting out 'Haaaaallllloooooo!' as if to say 'Good grief!! You!! Here!! Of all people!! Well I never. Coo. Stap me vitals, etc.'

CORRIEMOILLIE (n.)

The dreadful sinking sensation in a long passageway encounter when both protagonists immediately realise they have plumped for the corriedoo (q.v.) much too early as they are still a good thirty yards apart. They were embarassed by the pretence of corriecravie (q.v.) and decided to make use of the corriedoo because they felt silly. This was a mistake as corriedoo (q.v.) will make them seem far sillier

CORRIEVORRIE (n.)

Corridor etiquette demands that once a corriedoo (q.v.) has been declared, corrievorrie must be employed. Both protagnoists must now embellish their approach with an embarassing combination of waving, grinning, making idiot faces, doing pirate impressions, and waggling the head from side to side while holding the other person's eyes as the smile drips off their face, until with great relief, they pass each other.

CORRIEMUCHLOCH (n.)

Word describing the kind of person who can make a complete mess of a simple job like walking down a corridor


From Douglas Adams' and John Lloyd's Meaning of Liff